The Colour of Love

By Carissa McHolme

“Don’t you ever feel like you’re wasting your time?” Zoe asked whilst fidgeting with the elastic around her tiny wrist. “I mean, I know you love him, but you still don’t see colour,” she continued. I instantly replied, “I don’t. Zack makes me feel safe. He may not give colour to my dull world, but he gives me the exact warmth I’m positive shades have. Our love is more powerful than seeing things differently.” Just the thought of him made my heart skip a beat. It was clear that he wasn’t my destined lover, but he was my everything.

            It was Monday morning and Zoe and I were sitting on the train to work together. It was true, despite how much I loved Zack; I still didn’t see the world in anything other than black and white with many shades of grey. Meeting your soulmate was supposed to cause your world to explode in colour. Yet here I was, 5 years into my relationship, and still waiting to experience even a slight glimpse of a pale warm shade.  

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Before You Get Mad

There is probably one main thing you want to do when someone makes you angry: and that is not  'think rationally.' A nice alternative to that option is to say whatever it is that's going through your mind at that current moment in time. Trust me, that is not the best decision. People often say things they later regret when they spit whatever venom is currently in their head. Words can never be taken back. That is one lesson you will learn in life: either the hard way, or by reading this and realising the truth to that statement. In this post I have come up with 5 things you must always ask yourself before you get mad.

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Don't let how others treat you reflect upon how you treat them.

"Kindness. It doesn't cost a damn thing. Sprinkle that shit everywhere!" 

Truer words could not be spoken about the act of kindness. Choosing to be kind to someone doesn't cost anything in comparison to the opposite: choosing to be mean. You can choose to be mean, but in doing so you may ruin a friendship/relationship/your own reputation. So in the end you've paid a very high price, and is it truly even worth it in the long run? In my head the answer is an easy no. 

People are capable of being nasty and are able to treat others with little to no respect. Don't let how others treat you dictate who you are. If someone doesn't respect you, you should still respect them. Never mirror how someone treats you if it's a negative to begin with. That does absolutely nothing but make you the same as them. Do you really want to become a negative person just to get even with another individual? Or would you rather be a positive energy whom people enjoy to be around as you do nothing but uplift those close to you?

You need to stay true to the real you. Ask yourself the question, "is it worth becoming that kind of person just to get 'even' with someone like that," or would you rather edge yourself away from such negativity? Negative people are a burden to be around. They do absolutely nothing but bring you down to their own level. Either speaking lowly of others, or doing nothing but talk down upon everything in their life. Life can be hard at times, but you are still in total control of how you view it. There may be more negatives at the present, but there will always be at least one positive- no matter how small. I would much rather focus on that one small positive which will uplift your spirit, than the negatives which will do nothing but depress you and cause you (and possibly those around you) emotional harm.

I'm no shrink (or mathematician) but I can tell you one thing for certain- life is 1000% better when you stay true to yourself, and choose to be kind over being cruel. 

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Am I dating a Human or an Onion?

"I spent most of my nights crying and wondering why I just wasn’t enough. I refused to let go. Instead: I allowed myself to constantly be beaten, constantly shrunk. Until finally, I was a shadow of whom I once was. I was, putting it bluntly, pathetic."

If you had snooped in my room and managed to find my journal- that is a snippet of an entry you would've come across quite some time ago now. I was the fool who "fell for love." Just reading back on that now makes me angry at myself. To know that I allowed someone else to warp my whole perception of myself, and even change who I was, was insane. Reality is though- I'm far from the only person in the world to have done this to themselves. 

Today I am happy to say I am no longer a shadow of me. I will never allow my self value to be defined by others, nor will I ever stay around someone who is more poison than passion again. That relationship in general, wasn't the worst. The person I was with was kind (at times) and a great cheerleader to me. It's just certain things stood out more than the positives and therefore made me question myself and slowly change who I was to try make them happier. That was mistake number one. 

I am going to list a few things you should never have to feel/think/experience if you are in a Healthy relationship. 

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